You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Randomize
