I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
Randomize
