u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
