I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
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