Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
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