sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
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