and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Plan B is the new Plan A
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Randomize
