I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
