I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
I deserve to be covered in dicks
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Randomize
