dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
She's the barista slut.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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