We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
