Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
I'm always down for nudity.
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