We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
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