He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
Randomize
