I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
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