All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Randomize
