They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
Don't EVER smell your tampon
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
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