Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
