i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
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