We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Randomize