did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize
