Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize
