You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I bet he comes in French.
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
