Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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