Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
I will pee on everything he values.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Randomize
