Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Randomize
