I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
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