You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
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