Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Randomize
