All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Randomize
