oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
Randomize
