I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
