She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize
