I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
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