True but thats because hes a fetus.
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Randomize
