She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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