Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize