So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
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