he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
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