I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Randomize
