Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(206): View more from Washington

I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.

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(515): View more from Iowa

I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...

(316): View more from Kansas

Just the budget?

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(262): View more from Wisconsin

My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is

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(701): View more from North Dakota

I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.

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(919): View more from North Carolina

I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.

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