FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
its not stalking. its research.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
i dont even know how to be here
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Randomize
