this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
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