I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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