I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
Randomize
