I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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