Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
