I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize
