did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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