Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Randomize
